Posted 15:57 by Tycho

Ok, here's the story: I think I've lost Jen as a friend. Badness. Mucho badness. I hope I'm just being retarded, or that she's just giving me the temporary cold shoulder.

I'll find out soon enough--she's going to the same party I am tonight. I'm not expecting a hug or a warm greeting. In fact, if I get more than a mumbled "hello", I'll be happy.

I need to talk to her tonight or tomorrow though, in person. She needs to know that I'm not romantically attracted to her anymore, all I want is to see that our friendship is safe and sound, and, most importantly, still present.

Now, I think that I'm through the depression and anxiety disorder that I suffered, induced by high stress levels (bestowed upon me by, surprise surprise, Stress Analysis).

At this time, I feel obliged to recognize and thank all those who have helped me through this hard time, no matter how much of an ass I have been:

Josh. Despite having a huge crush on Jen, as well, he did his best to help me all the time, even when it MIGHT have meant she would prefer me over him (which is not the case, but that's beside the point). You were willing to give it all up for me. You listened to me rant and rave and worry and bitch stoically. You told me how it was, and gave me encouragement throughout the ordeal. I wish I took your approach to Stress Analysis: not even go to class. This wouldn't have happened if I took a more relaxed view of it. Thank you.

Ray. I only talked to him once about it, last night. He pounded some sense into my head. He gave me confidence and gave me sound advice through his own painful experiences. Thank you, for you gave me hope that this situation will be resolved, even if it takes a long time.

Jen. Even though you probably hated my guts for a while, you were sincerely worried about my health and well being, and you stayed by me through it. Now I'm paying the price, but thank you for being there when I needed it most. I hope the friendship we had will survive.

Russ. You persistently asked what was wrong, and got so annoying to the point that I told you. You put things back into perspective for me, and gave me encouragement. You forced me to relax, even though it meant that you got REALLY far being in your Stress Analysis homework (but you did take back the lead in our billiards challenge, 15 games to 13). Thank you.

Chris and Ron. I can't very well distinguish you guys separately, now, can I? All you've offered is support and encouragement, and reassured me that everything will turn out for the better. Chris, your humor brought me through the hardest times, and Ron, your advice from personal experience kept me from worrying too much. I can't wait to see you guys over Thanksgiving Break. Its been to damn long. Thank you. You've always been there for me in the past, whether its saving my life (literally) or making sure that I've got someone to hang with. Again, my thanks go to you.

Bill. For your cynical humor and your insulting nature. Damn its good to have you as a roommate. Thank you.

Owen. For taking 5 classes, yet still have the time to make sure I was going to be alright. Thank you. Another person I'm proud to call "roommate".

Topher. For the best e-mail in the world. Ok, more seriously, you made time to listen to me despite your uber-busy schedule, and you gave me sound advice and gave me things to think about. Thank you.

I know there are more people I HAVE to thank, but I can't remember them. Heh, just look how grateful I am! You help me through the hardest 2 weeks of my life, and I forget you and your contributions :-(. You have my thanks.

Thank you, all of you. Without God, without my friends (thats you guys), I wouldn't have been able to pull through and recover from those high stress levels.

Sorry if that sounded sappy, but that is how it has to be. I've got to go eat before the party. Take care everyone.