Mechanical engineer, material scientist. Loves to run, play billiards, swim, and be outdoors.
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Friday, November 21, 2003
Yay for today. Not a great day.
Pretty much fell asleep in Stress, I'm too worried about other things. I did the extra credit problem, but couldn't get a numerical answer, I just explained in words how to solve it, and why it must be solved that way.
Received a reply from Jen, and actually read it before I went to cook supper...I couldn't resist the urge, much as I was afraid of opening it. The reply I had been expecting wasn't there. The one I got was not what I was she would write. It reminded me of why I'm attracted to her. I still need to tell her some things, but I'm not ready for it.
Talked to Josh tonight. Very unsettling. Don't prepare me for pain...just tell me and be straight with me. He harped alot over if I'd be ok if he flirted with Jen---despite him saying that he has no intention of really flirting at all with her. Sorry to say this, dude, but you were REALLY contradicting yourself there. And now thats made me anxious. If you're going to tell me something, don't prepare me and prepare me, just tell me! It REALLY feels like you're holding something back. Trust me, I've learned from experience, if someone tries to avoid hurting you, when you eventually find out, it hurts 10 times as much. Don't do that to me. Please. I'd go completely insane and then I'd REALLY be in some dire straits, I'm still stressed out alot, just not as much or as stressed.
Alright, whatever. You know, I can't control that situation. I can't worry about it...yet I still do. Its so much easier said than done.
After talking with Josh, I'm really not wanting to go tomorrow. He just keeps getting me nervous and anxious. Now I can't stop thinking...mind is racing...not cool. Not your fault, man, its mine.
Yeah, well, what happens, happens. Jen isn't attracted to me, so I should really stop crying like a baby and move on. I've nearly shattered our friendship, and right now, thats what means the most to me. She could say "oh, you have no chance to be with me...EVER!!!" and I wouldn't care, so long as I can save our friendship.
Ok, I know what I said was really irrational, but I'm over tired. Good night. I'll fix it up later, or just leave it as proof that I am human. And therefore am subject to jealousy, love, desire, disappointment, happiness, etc. Aye, its good to be alive.
Pretty much fell asleep in Stress, I'm too worried about other things. I did the extra credit problem, but couldn't get a numerical answer, I just explained in words how to solve it, and why it must be solved that way.
Received a reply from Jen, and actually read it before I went to cook supper...I couldn't resist the urge, much as I was afraid of opening it. The reply I had been expecting wasn't there. The one I got was not what I was she would write. It reminded me of why I'm attracted to her. I still need to tell her some things, but I'm not ready for it.
Talked to Josh tonight. Very unsettling. Don't prepare me for pain...just tell me and be straight with me. He harped alot over if I'd be ok if he flirted with Jen---despite him saying that he has no intention of really flirting at all with her. Sorry to say this, dude, but you were REALLY contradicting yourself there. And now thats made me anxious. If you're going to tell me something, don't prepare me and prepare me, just tell me! It REALLY feels like you're holding something back. Trust me, I've learned from experience, if someone tries to avoid hurting you, when you eventually find out, it hurts 10 times as much. Don't do that to me. Please. I'd go completely insane and then I'd REALLY be in some dire straits, I'm still stressed out alot, just not as much or as stressed.
Alright, whatever. You know, I can't control that situation. I can't worry about it...yet I still do. Its so much easier said than done.
After talking with Josh, I'm really not wanting to go tomorrow. He just keeps getting me nervous and anxious. Now I can't stop thinking...mind is racing...not cool. Not your fault, man, its mine.
Yeah, well, what happens, happens. Jen isn't attracted to me, so I should really stop crying like a baby and move on. I've nearly shattered our friendship, and right now, thats what means the most to me. She could say "oh, you have no chance to be with me...EVER!!!" and I wouldn't care, so long as I can save our friendship.
Ok, I know what I said was really irrational, but I'm over tired. Good night. I'll fix it up later, or just leave it as proof that I am human. And therefore am subject to jealousy, love, desire, disappointment, happiness, etc. Aye, its good to be alive.
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