Posted 12:24 by Tycho

Ok, abrupt change in pace. I will now also put down stuff for writing class in here, so I can kill two birds with one stone.

Fight practice was pretty fun last night. 5 way free for alls. Good fun stuff. Note to self--GET TARGET ARROWS!!

Despite a FULL 8 hours sleep (W00T!!!) last night, I'm feeling rather tired now. Damn you Megan! You might have given my your cold! :-P

Now, I fucked up on ANOTHER stress quiz--I got rushed at the end and forgot something in a diagram, so my equations there got screwed up a bit. But our procedure was 60% of the grade, so I think I'll actually pass this one. And I'm REALLY looking forward to this weekend...Stress galore!!!

I'm going to try and buckle down tonight so I won't have so much of it over the weekend. Either that, or do ALL my homework due Tuesday for my seminars tonight, so I can work on my Stress all weekend. Stupid Hoist model. It wouldn't be so boring if there were so damn much of it.

Getting over emotions is getting routine for me. I've just experienced such a range of them--some of them I didn't think I was capable of feeling. Despite some of them making me feel like shit, they remind me that I am still alive, and that living in a sense-deprived society (Equilibrium-esque) would suck beyond the shitty emotions, for we all have to take the good along with the bad in life.

Posted 18:17 by Tycho

Sometimes I just wanna punch myself. Heh, never thought I'd ever say that.

Reasons:

1. Being a retard in regard to stress analysis (it AIN'T that hard! I just fuck up every single time!). I had to redo all of yesterday's AND today's homework.

2. Still have that problem with girls, lol. I still can't bear to ask one out directly. I dunno what it is. Meh, doesn't matter. If they don't like me, hell, their loss of a perfectly good insane wacky bastard bachelor. Plus I really don't have the time to devote to a girlfriend, so I wouldn't want to start a relationship and then just destroy it because I didn't think about time commitment. Plus the $$$. I know its not needed to go out all the time, and when you have a girlfriend, you better treat her right, not like all these other assholes who treat their girlfriends like shit.

3. I'm really tired and hence my thinking and reasoning capabilities are suffering. So I don't really talk anymore. I open my mouth and this gibberish comes out. *Opens mouth* A;LJPAOIETRA;LEWRHTALDNFGA;DL FJE!!!!!!!! See what I mean? GO TO BED EARLIER YOU FOOL!!!

4. By the time I'm finished with work (except for now), I have really no time to go out and do things at all. Note to self: DON'T DO HOMEWORK DISTRACTIONS. Working on that one. Did it today, hence I'm relaxing now. But I've got to redo that monstrous stress problem (technically a statis problem, though), but this time I'm going to have a computer program do all the calculations :-).

Aye, and looking on the bright side of things:

1. Didn't lose the friend, like I thought I had.

2. Newbie Fight practice tonight! Time to smack down some n00bs, hehehe. I'll pwn them!!! MUAHAHAHAHA. Not really. It'll be fun, with some good fights.

3. Weekend is coming up!

I've also considered switching over to livejournal.com, just because they allow comments to be made. I know at least Chris reads this, and I almost never have a chance to talk to Chris, so he'll be able to leave a comment for me.

To be honest, I have no idea whom else reads my blog. The only reason I know Chris does is because he's the one who prompted me to start the thing!

So, if you read my blog, tell me! That way I can say things made for a wider audience than just Chris! Think about how zany I could get! :-P

I did get a 5/10 on my first stress analysis quiz, but that was my own stupidity because I didn't notice that the damned pin was out on the diagram. Oh well. Can't worry about it anymore--its done and over with.

Take care all of you (or maybe just Chris, I have no idea!)!

Posted 15:54 by Tycho

Bah! Can't get rid of last bits of jealousy...damnit all! This isn't cool. Supposedly normal, yet why do I feel dishonored for being jealous? This really pisses me off. Someone needs to give me a good smack or something. Might jolt my brains around enough to get back to normality.

So does having to redo all of yesterday's stress homework. Finished all my essays though.

Time to do more work, more later, bye.

Posted 22:49 by Tycho

Here's the update, as promised!

1. I'm incredibly tired.
2. I need sleep.
3. Did I mention tired?
4. How about some food?
5. Beer? Beer? Brew-Dogs? Brew-Dizzogs?

Aye, today has been a long day indeed. It started at 6:30 in the morning, when Topher wakes up every day (I heard him turn on the shower water). I couldn't get back to sleep.

So I laid in bed, too tired to move, yet not tired enough to sleep, and tried to relax for an hour...I failed, because I could not clear my head for even a moment. Too much for me to think about. Like how much it sucks to have an 8 AM course.

I didn't really understand the full extent of Stress Analysis...today alone, I spent 1 hour in class, and 7.5 hours working on the homework.

Then I read an entire book today, cover to cover...about a climber who survived against all odds when he fell and pretty much drove his fibula and tibia straight through his knee into his femur (I can NEVER remember if its "fibula and tibia" or "tibula" and "fibia", though the first pair sounds more "right".)

That reminded of just how lucky I am. Sure, I have asthma, my vision isn't perfect, I may not be the best looking guy around, nor the strongest, fastest, or smartest. But damn am I lucky.

First of all, I have a roof over my head every night, and I have a place to go to for safety. Secondly, I am able to eat 3 square meals a day. Thirdly, I am in excellent health, other than the eyes (which don't bother me--glasses aren't bad at all). We'll see just what shape I become after Thanksgiving. Say hello to the new Santa Claus!

Ok, sorry to bore you with that, back to all about me!

Ok, back to actual subjects:

While we were having about as much fun as receiving a swift kick to the nuts with our Stress homework, we needed food, so we made chili nachos for supper. Damn good. It was a welcome break from work.

As to how I've relaxed today...well, I really haven't. Bah. Oh well, worse things can happen to me (like being shot when off campus).

Now back to relaxing: everyone needs to go to http://www.happytreefriends.com !!!--"More fun than a stick!"

I need to get back into martial arts. 10 years experience isn't enough. Ever since I stopped, I've had this yearning to train and practice hand to hand combat. Its exhilirating. I highly suggest anyone even remotely interested, or not interested at all, to try it.

"For Boston! For Boston! Thy Glory is our own!" --Dropkick Murphy's, For Boston.

George Carlin is wicked funny. :-D

Posted 19:04 by Tycho

Oh boy, if I thought the first stress problem was difficult...holy shit was I in for a surprise.

Russ and I worked for about a total of 6 hours on that hellish problem. Once we finished the free body diagrams, we learned that there were 14 unkown forces we had to solve for, and boy, let me tell you just how happy we were...and we did it wrong--the summation of forces doesn't add to 0!!! Somewhere we made a mistake.

And its time I take a shower.

SHIT!!! I just remembered I have one last part to go on that stress problem! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Well, at least I made good progress on the book I need to read for class. Its not bad, not boring, like I had thought it might have been.

I'll probably do a more betterer entry later on, once I've finished my work for the night.

Posted 11:04 by Tycho

Aye chiwowa!

Took us about an hour or an hour and a half to batter ourselves through the first stress analysis problem. It was rather simple, to be honest, but there were some difficulties that we didn't account for. And we're supposed to be smart or something like that.

Ok, other things I've done today: I've eaten. Its a good sign of me returning to normal (I couldn't eat at all yesterday and felt sick, but forced myself to have a little something here and there to keep up my strength and concentration). So, aye, my idiocy is over. It came with a cost, a heavy cost. But nothing comes without having to pay for it. Nothing is free. I can also deal with the consequences of my stupidity: my fault, my responsibility to accept what comes and try to clean up my mess.

I've got one more stress analysis problem to do for today...they're actually interesting problems, just REALLY time consuming. Then I've got to read a book. Then I've got to write a 5 page paper on said book.

I also have to write up my writings from yesterday. Going outside to get inspiration reminded me of just how much I love nature and being in it. I can't wait to go camping again and get away from civilization, even if just for a day.

Today is a busy day, but I'm feeling up to the challenge. Actually, I feel like I can conquer the world...and Ron, no, I'm not bringing my white flag...what do I look like? French?

"I wanna run away,
Never say good bye,
I want to know the truth,
Instead of wondering why,
I wanna know the answers,
NO MORE LIES,
I want to shut the door,
And open up my mind!"

--Linkin' Park, "Run Away", fits my mood, great song, even if it didn't :-P.

Next up: "The Gauntlet" by the Dropkick Murphys. My favorite song. It can get my blood pumping no matter what.

Oh, I nearly forgot: my cousin has recovered!!! Maybe not completely, but he's out of danger, and stable, so he's not in the ICU anymore :-).

Posted 08:56 by Tycho

Ok, its pretty much confirmed. I've lost a friend.

I hate myself for it, but it was my fault...

Now back to stress analysis.

If anyone hadn't noticed, I was a bit out of my mind the past few days, and hopefully people will let that go, and let bygones be bygones.

Aye, back to getting white hairs!

Posted 00:49 by Tycho

Figured out why I was pissed and jealous.

I miss hanging with Jen (no, you retards, not in a NOOSE). And due to my limited perspective, it seems that everyone else that knows her gets to hang out with her whenever they feel like it (example: because they have cars), and I don't.

After thinking objectively, I've found its much like how I'm jealous for a couple hours every Friday night, because I know you guys'll be going in town. And I miss that.

Do I make sense here?

But what I did say earlier was true...I was told that there was always room for me...but that offer was never backed up--I mean, how can I go if I'm not informed?

I guess I felt REALLY left out, and got into one of those depressive "sorry for myself" moods that I sometimes swing into.

I felt left out because despite being told that I was always welcome to go with him, I really truely wasn't--its obvious because he never tried to contact me or tell me about it. And so I got rather pissed about that--he wasn't being completely straight with me.

And therefore, I felt unwelcome and left out. Hence the start of my huge ass post that was inflammatory and upsetting and assholish. I should have THOUGHT before venting.

Aye, now when one of them sees this, its going to be severe "ouch time". But I'm ready, for whatever happens, happens, and all I can do is roll with the punches and play the cards life has dealt me.

I can't fault him for not telling me. What I dislike immensely is how I was told that it'd be really cool and fun if I went...yet I end up left out. But hell, he WAS delivering her birthday present, so he had his reasons, and they are perfectly understandable.

So, to recap:

1. I SEVERELY overreacted. I'm sorry. I'll try to make it up to you guys as best I can...its gonna take a damn long time, but I owe a debt of honor here.

2. I've learned to deal with these thoughts and feelings. Its simple: don't get them in the first place. There was a reason for me to feel like that, but was it really worth it? All it did was make me feel jealous and envious, and at the very worst, could cost me 2 friends. I did the math far too late....and the results weren't good...not good at all.

3. I feel excellent right now...other than having to get up at 0700 hours.

4. Have fun Friday guys. Don't hit on the waitresses at Jillian's or anything. Remember, thats MY job. As I'm the TRUE pimpmaster funk around here, and you guys best not infringe upon my territory! :-P

Oh, and Chuck...don't you think $4.50 for a beer is a little too expensive? Try going to a liquor store :-D.

5. I'm in a silly mood right now. Legs hurt like hell though. Maybe not stretching properly after a 5.5 mile run wasn't such a good idea as I thought it was at the time.

Au revoir, mes amis. Fare ye well, and I'll have better news and entertainment for tomorrow. No more of this me bitching for no reason bullshit. Well, maybe some of that, but not on the subject of tonight. Only funny stuff, like how I sprinted across 495 naked in the morning and some guys tried to run me down. Well, ok, only funny stuff thats real.

About the funniest thing I can think of right now is when I got my toe stuck in the wheel of my bike and I did flip on it. Or how I got hit with a bottle rocket at the Squantum Bonfire.

Or how I lit my feet on fire four times one night (hell, I had reason!!!).

I just pray that everyone give me a chance to redeem myself here. I know I probably don't really deserve it all that much, but I can always hope.

La mieux de la chance a tout le monde! And good night!

Posted 21:46 by Tycho

Aye, this post was unnecessary and extremely long and stupid. I apologize for any and all inconveniences.

Posted 12:49 by Tycho

Just got back from a nice middle-distance run...I feel like shit (not because of the running, though, I have a feeling something else is making me feel this way). I re-acclimated myself to Worcester's "thin" air (compared to Quincy), and just had a good run all around. Went at a comfortable pace, and the only thing that truely gave me trouble was the hill right by St. John's Prep Elementary school...that hill ALWAYS kills me--I just look at it and my legs get all wobbly. Well, its more fun to run up than Bancroft Hill. I should be thankful for that. I'm a bit dehydrated now, which accounts for some of the shittiness that I'm feeling, but I feel sick to my stomach as well...not pukey pukey, but it feels like a case of mild nausea (yah, I know, I can't spell, so kiss me arse and sue me). Total distance covered: 5.5 miles. It was almost a perfect run, other than the rain--perfect temperature, humidity wasn't too bad. Close calls with death while running: 2...don't people look out for runners on the side of the road anymore? Then I did some pullups and stretched out at Alumni.

Now its time for a well-deserved hot shower, then time to be a pool-shark (if there any tables available, and if there aren't----ARGH ME MATEYS! MAKE 'EM WALK THE PLANK THE LAND LUBBERS!!! ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!).

Heh, that reminds me how I won a free round of mini-golf at Pirate's Cove--odds were 18:1 that I'd get one (I got a hole in one at Hole #....#....#4 I want to say, it was either that or Hole #6). Then, of course, when I played with my parents at another Pirate's Cove, we got (between the three of us) 7 or 8 holes in one...well, maybe not that many, but some insane number, like i. Yes, we got i holes in one. I guess that makes us REALLY special--(for those of you who hate math: i is the notation for the imaginary number, aka the square root of -1). Damn, we're good.

That also reminds me of playing mini-golf when I was younger, and used the putter as a driver (I didn't know better), nearly took some guys head off. Boy, was he pleased.

Cost of books: $158.80
Cost of college: $38,000
Watching all your work and exams and useless textbooks be consumed by flames at the Squantum Bonfire: PRICELESS

Hopefully I won't be hit by a bottle rocket or the shrapnel from one or something this time around.

I wish I have provided a few minutes of chuckles (with me or at me, I don't care) for you guys. Since I don't have homework or classes or anyone to really go out with just yet, I decided to torture you guys with REALLY long, rantish, nonsensical meanderings of my mind. Got milk?

Posted 11:12 by Tycho

This is stupid. My Stress Analysis book isn't even a book...its a bunch of photocopies from the book with an elastic around it being sold for $28.75. I could have done that for...well, alot cheaper than that! Maybe for around $20 (assuming 400 pages)...are they trying to tell me to 3 hole punch it they're going to charge $8.75?!? BAH!

My history course...which is supposedly about EUROPEAN history, seems to revolve around HISTORY OF MOUNT EVEREST, if the books are good to judge by. All 4 books are about Mt. Everest. This is going to suck bad.

Creative writing has 3 books...ok...

I feel like bashing my head against the wall repeatedly until I pass out. This is retarded.

All right, almost time to go running...

Posted 02:30 by Tycho

I promise this is the last one of the night...but then again I shouldn't make promises I just might have to break.

But evidently someone made a site just for me, explaining why I'm the lamest guy around: http://matthew.youarelame.com/

No wonder people hate me. They might start to like me if I changed some of that stuff.

Posted 02:19 by Tycho

So here I am, at 0138 hours, listening to Dropkick Murphy's ("The Streets of Boston", with "Noble" up next, then "Fortunes of War" after that). I'm also talking to a couple people...well, maybe its just one person...seeing double is fun :-). Well, just kidding, the other person abandoned me to go kill shit and eat it by playing Half-Life. What nerve! :-P.

Aye, I'm a bored man right now. But far from ready to sleep. Too much to think about. Too much to do.

I feel like ranting about retarded liberals right now. But I don't have the time nor the patience nor the rage necessary to make a good, funny, yet serious rant. We'll just have to suffice with the quote "LIBERALS suX0rZ!!!" and "Conservatives r0x0rs j00 b0x0rs!!! PWNED!!!". Yes, thats a good, simple, and accurate way to put it. Sometimes I can't stand left-wingers. I only wanted to punch one of them though--he was expressing his hope that all US soldiers sent over there would die bloody deaths. Oooh...I was pissed to high hell...sure, it wasn't the most enraged I've ever become, but it was a cold hatred, a cold anger I held for the protestor. Not every enlisted personnel agrees with a war, or why its being fought. When the order is given, they nonetheless enter the combat zone and risk life and limb to fight the enemy. Reason? They were ordered to. They swore an oath to. They don't fight because they want to--hell, war is the most horrible thing you can put a man through. I know many veterans...at least one from every conflict or war we've participated in since 1939 (the arbitrary starting year of World War II)...war changes a man. A man goes to war a joyful guy, but when he comes back, its an empty shell shaped by violence, blood, and death. They don't fight because they feel like it or believe in their cause. They start fighting because they're ordered to. After the initial shock of battle, they don't even fight because they're ordered to--they fight for each other. Once you're in the combat zone, all that lies between you and death, is your trust and friendship with the guy next to you. I've heard stories where a man would be hit and drop, and someone would leave cover and drag them back to safety under intense fire, and many times the would-be rescuer would be killed either on the way to the fallen man or on the way back. To even insinuate that our fighting men fight because they all want Arabs to die or they're bloodthirsty or they want to be part of a new Crusade is the height of stupidity and idiocy. When one joins the army, they understand that they are putting themselves at risk. They understand that they may not agree with the war or conflict or police action or whatever you want to call (well, it doesn't matter if you buy the farm during a full-blown war or a small scale police action--either way, you're still flying home in a body bag). They accept that. They also accept the reality that when the order to go is given, they go, without question. The only time there should be a question about orders is when the orders are blatantly illegal (ie go out and massacre every person in sight, regardless of age or affiliation). Questioning orders is insubordination, and it can lead the deaths of your comrades. If you do not agree to the war, then you apply for concientious objector status (not sure you can do this once your unit is assigned to the combat zone, though), or you talk to your superiors about it. You do NOT murder your comrade-in-arms, your friends, men who trusted you, in cold blood, like many anti-war protestors have encouraged. One group actually encouraged that enlisted men kill their officers.

Oh, and don't think that was randomly done or anything...well, it was, but the only reason I ranted for so long was that I'm waiting to brush my teeth and have nothing else to do :-P. Whomever is in the shower is taking their damn sweet time about it. Unfortunately, I can't blame him, because I did receive advanced warning, which I obviously failed to heed.

I doubt any of you would read the entire thing, because I know much of it is unordered and nonsensical, but its good work considering its now after 0200 hours. Yes, I've got alot on my mind.

Its understood that my writing style in blogs is unordered and somewhat mind boggling. That is because I intentionally write down whatever comes to my head first. This is my way of relaxing, of kicking back. I shouldn't have to actually do any logical thinking to be able to have fun and possibly provide a few minutes of entertainment for my friends (which is the primary reason I do this, by the way--just to give you guys a couple of cheap chuckles or a well-needed laugh).

For some reason I'm in the mood for a good war movie. Maybe "The Longest Day" or "The Lost Battalion"...or maybe even the depiction of Pickett's Charge in "Gettysburg".

Alright, enough of my bitching and moaning and groaning, I'll see you all on the flip side.

Posted 01:14 by Tycho

Okely Dokely. Lots of good things have happened. Well...actually, only two. I woke up, and the YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK YANKEES SUCK

Sorry, had to get that out of my system. It was a strange ending to a game, though, Posada hits it to Beckett, and Beckett tags Posada out on his way to first. I was expecting a 6-3 flip to end it, but I was quite pleasantly surprised. Or I was thinking that the Yankees would get a man on with 1 out, and Posada would ground into the 6-4-3 double play. Well, now we know just how much my predictions are worth.

Alright, before you think I'm insane or anything, here's the events of today. Woke up (covered that one!), ate a light breakfast--that tripe was still making me feel pukey-pukey in the morning...I was sorta afraid I had a mild case of food poisoning or something.

I then proceeded to play Tribes II multiplayer, and kicked ass and took names...or is it kicked names and took ass? I dunno which way it goes anymore. Anyways, I'm an excellent sniper in that game...there isn't anything I can't hit--so long as there's not too much lag...or at least a consistent amount of lag.

Alright, so I got back to the Worker's Anti-Communist Democratic Non-Republic of F15 today at about 1600 or 1630 hours. Unpacked, said good bye to Dad. And went and played pool. I'm sadly no longer a pool shark...I lost much of my skill over the 10 day break...or at least that insane amount of skill I had.

Interruption~My roommate Russ got a grade of "Q" in Static Systems...way to go, man, thats like, worse than an NR or something...I mean, look at that alphabetizing! Yeah, that was pretty random...but hell, thats my life!

So then I played some more Tribes II, since no one was around for me to hang out with...and pretty much ripped it up...you know, thats a bad thing. That means I have to get out more often...DAMN MY F*CKING LACK OF A CAR!!! Even if I had one, I couldn't bring it to WPI--another one of my roommates got the very last parking sticker for the Fuller lot, and gave it to his friend from another school so he could park here when going to parties at Assumption or some shit like that. Sometimes I feel the world is out to get me, y'know? y'know? y'know? Well, its a dog eat dog world, so I'd best sharpen my teeth and toughen my hide before shit like this gets serious.

Russ then got back, so I helped him move back in, then we baked a pizza and watched "Road to Perdition"--wicked awesome movie, but I can't stand the ending. I don't know why I mislike it. Its just so...I don't know, its something I at least can't describe accurately.

My mood has improved ever since the tripe has gotten out of my system, though, so I'm in really good spirit now, feel like I'm unstoppable like the Hulk...or the Juggernaut...or some guy with the BFG9000 (the F ain't for "fancy", neither, naw-sir!). I just sorta feel alone in the world, still. I could continue to explain, but that'd take too long, and once I'd finished, you'd think I were mad or some crap like that, not that you'd think otherwise. And no, its not due to the lack of a girlfriend or not having friends--hell, what do you guys think you are? You ARE my friends, so you all have a right to beat me down if I EVER say that I have no friends. But there's something niggling at my spirit, something down deep, something I can't quite put my finger on just yet that continuously bugs me.

Side note: FLEET BANK SUCKS!!! After hearing some first-hand horror stories, I agree with that viewpoint.

Back on topic...wait...was there a topic? Or was it my maniacal rantings again? I can't ever seem to remember the difference between the two...can you?

So yeah, I'm probably going to go back to my Tribes II euphoria and blow shit up and die in a blaze of glory (Ron, Chris: Blaze of Glory Button, anyone?). Or, on the other hand, I could go to sleep so I'll be nice and refreshed for the morning and get ready to get books.

I've got to grab a Stress Analysis book, and whatever books are needed for my history and writing courses (yech...). Well, writing might be a really fun class if it isn't taught by a writing nazi (ie 10 page papers due every other day and crap like that), despite my lack of talent and eloquence.

History has potential for being an interesting course, especially if it centers around the Second World War...and I will drool with interest if we cover Operation Neptune and Operation Overlord in depth (aka Normandy Invasion, June 5-6, 1944).

I see Russ is right on time with his, "Dude, you need a girlfriend" comment. Stated twice, because I haven't seen him for two weeks. He's got this down to a science. Once a week, right on the button.

1000 hours sounds like a good time to wake up and smell the roses (or car exhaust, which is the more realistic outcome). I'll grab books, play pool, relax, then go to fight practice. Maybe go to Denny's afterwards. Aye, tomorrow will be a day for the history books. Only time will tell the tale.

See y'all around later.

I pray to God that I will always be faithful, always be loyal, and always be honorable. May His will guide me until the end of my days here on Earth. May He keep watch over all of you and help you whenever you need it.

# Times almost killed on way back to Worcester: 4. Aye, it was a hairy ride. Good night everyone.

Posted 01:04 by Tycho

Update #3 for the night: I feel like total shit. I also feel like I'm a complete loser and asshole who'll get nowhere in life.

Its a wonder I have friends, but I thank God for each and every one of them, else my life would be a true shithole.

Posted 00:28 by Tycho

I hate it when people lie to me. Absolutely hate it. I go out of my way to be straight with people...is it too much to ask for them the be the same way with me?

My mind is currently clouded with a maelstrom of fury.

Posted 00:05 by Tycho

Today was a good and bad day.

The bad part of today: having to get up before I felt like it (1200 hours...aka noon).

The good part of today: going out to eat with my immediate and some of my extended family (grandmother, aunt, uncle). The place was really good...except I made the mistake of ordering tripe...NEVER EVER EVER eat tripe!!! Its REALLY disgusting, and tastes like slime. My brain should've kicked in and not ordered it once I found out it's the interior lining of a cow's stomach, but my urge to try something new destroyed all reason and logic. Curiousity DOES kill the cat...note to self...STOP BEING CURIOUS!!!

TRIPE IS DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Had two cups of coffee...and since its been a while since I've had real good strong coffee, I got the "shakes", while my mind is racing a mile a second with almost no coherent thought coming out of that jumbled mess that I call a "brain".

Looking back on vacation, it certainly was better than I may say it is...I mean, sure, I missed all my friends in Worcester, and I didn't get to hang out with them at all...but then again, I was able to hang out with my friends at home on friday nights (not during the week--they all either work or are still in school, leaving me with no one to hang out with 99% of the time).

I volunteered at InterFaith Social Services Bureau on Tuesday and Thursday, and caught up with the goings on over there.

Several of the nights I'd go for a fun run with Chris (~5 miles, including running to and from Marina Bay). We got to do some really good hill workouts. The best part of it was (besides running with him) is that my hip didn't hurt at all, and I may be making a fast recovery. I might be able to catch the tail end of the road racing season if I'm lucky. If not, well, there's always next year, and this time I'm NOT going to get hurt.

Being at home both kicked ass and sucked, but it was worth it. Sure, I missed the guys back in Worcester, but then again I don't know how much longer I could go without seeing my friends from back home.

To my friends in Worcester: I'll see you soon. To my friends in Quincy: I pray I'll see you guys again, hopefully around Thanksgiving.

Life is full of heartbreaks. I'd best get some armor.

Je mourrais plutôt que soyez déshonoré!!!

Posted 22:48 by Tycho

Ok, had big post. But I accidentally closed program. Go me!

Umm...went out tonight to CambridgeSide Galleria as a last hurrah with my friends...we did some major carousing, let me tell you. Had a blast! Only downside was that we didn't manage to get kicked out of Brookstones tonight.

Helped unload 4000 lbs of food at the pantry yesterday. Reason I didn't feel good was because I ate way too many M&M's. Went from sugar high to sugar low in only a few minutes...not good at all...

Just made a toast with my friend...to my not peeing my pants Monday night. Wearing a diaper was suggested...and promptly discarded as a course of action. Everyone will eventually know why.

Mille de merci a ils qui a me donnent leurs temps pour lire ma journal. It means alot to me that you guys keep an eye on me.

MALO MORI QUAM FOEDARI!!!

Posted 22:48 by Tycho

Posted 22:52 by Tycho

Another so-so day at home. Much as I miss you guys back in Worcester (including those not from WPI that dare make the harrowing trek up to Geekville), home is still a good place to be. Unfortunately, everyone else is still either at school or on co-op (bloody traitors, should all be put to the sword!), so I'm left with pretty much nothing to do everyday (minus running with Chris). I might be able to go out Friday night with the guys (and do as we always do, movie, food, talk about life, women, and sports), and maybe...MAYBE be able to go to the Matrix-o-Thon on Saturday. Thats still up in the air, though.

Today's work...went to North to try and corrup--erm... get young blood for ou--ummm...inform high school students of their opportunities at WPI and reasons why they should consider applying. Woo-hoo for us...we got all of 2 students!!! Well, I must say, it is much better than 0. Then I got to visit my old teacher's and learn the the curriculum is going to shit because of the damned MCAS.

Went home, grabbed lunch, got injected with needle (flu vaccine, or at least it was supposed to--you never truly know whats inside those vials), then went to visit my old high school robotics team...and to be honest they seem to be a hopeless cause...they do remind me of when I was a freshman...young...stupid...incredibly energetic (well...I still am, but in a good way, I like to think), and some of them are true assholes who might push me over the edge some day (or they might feel cocky and take a swing at me, and then they get to experience--first hand!--over 10 years of martial arts training that I've received). Actually, its only one. If he actually survives ROTC to become an officer, I pity those who will be under his command. I shouldn't be so hard on him, because he still has a long time to change his attitude and be turned into a very good guy. Hell, I know I f*cked up freshman year (you think a squirrel is rambunctious and annoying? I would so kick a squirrel's ass in those categories if it were a contest), and I *think* I turned out half-way decent...I still have moments of being extremely hyper and nonsensical, but its only for a few seconds or so, rather than my permanent state.

Tomorrow's plans: volunteer at pantry (going to Boston for food pickup--unfortunately I won't be able to help them with loading the 2 tons or so of food into the van, but I sure as hell am going to make sure I'm there to help unload it and get it packed away). You'd be surprised at how fast we go through those 2 tons of food. Especially if food donations are down (which they are during the summer :-( ). It won't be a fun time at the pantry tomorrow, but it needs to get done.

After the pantry, is lunchtime. Then...absolutely nothing until I go running with Chris at about 1800 hours.

You never know how much you miss schoolwork until you finally have nothing to do. I'd take doing work over complete boredom anyday. And may I appreciate it for what it is the next time around.

Ok, enough moaning and groaning and ranting by me.

Thanks for taking the time to read it, guys. I appreciate that you take a couple of minutes out of your lives every so often to check up on me and see what I'm up to and make sure I'm doing well. See y'all on the flip side.

Posted 21:19 by Tycho

Here is the scoop of today...excellent news, on all counts, except for one (having to wake up at 0800 hours).

Got to volunteer at the pantry for a couple hours and say hi to everyone.

Then I went out to lunch with my Dad, then headed over to Best Buy (just to look around) and Sports Authority (to see how much arrows and target tips cost--relatively expensive, so I'll have to hold off on true archery until I am able to make a wage).

Came back and checked my grades...wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am---A's across the board. I don't know how the hell I pulled off an A in Tricky Lui's class, damn that was hard...

To round out a perfect (well, not perfect, mind you, but certainly approaching it) day, I went jogging with Chris. We had a nice relaxing 3 mile fun run through Squantum and did some excellent hill work. Aye, good work today.

I've *ALMOST* finished A Storm of Swords (only have the epilogue left), and DAMN was that a good book. Though I will have to throttle George R. R. Martin for some of the things that happen (you bastard! :-P). I will DEFINITELY be buying the fourth book in the series. His "A Song of Ice and Fire" series KICKS ASS.

Long live the Night's Watch...

Posted 22:23 by Tycho

Ok, today was a good and bad day, but DEFINITELY more of the bad. So here it is from the beginning.

Woke up at about 11:20 (shut up Chris, you weren't up either, so don't give me crap about not running with you :-P )

Ate lots of pancakes for breakfast.

Arrived at Chris's house at about 1330 hours. Went to Blockbuster. Rented "Equilibrium". Watched 1.75 hours of Gun-Kata goodness. Got driven home.

Ate supper. Played a game of Sorry with my parents.

Phone rings. Find out that cousin is in critical condition after overdosing on heroin, and is currently on a ventilator. I would appreciate it if everyone said a prayer for him. I thank you all in advance for your care and concern.

On a much much happier note: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JEN!!!!!!!

I wish you a fun-filled, safe, and successful birthday, Granny! And I will remember to give you birthday beatings! (Don't forget your pills!)

Posted 00:22 by Tycho

Hey all, I'm going to be picked up in a few hours.

Jen is a sick dirty person :-P.

Just got back from a party tonight...better than spending the night alone in my apartment playing games.

I don't really want to go home. Lots of stuff I'm missing this week. The Black and White Masquerade Ball. Blackjack. Jen's birthday, fight practice (both on Monday, and being home might be a good thing in this case--she won't be able to hit me)...a whole week of playing pool, running Cross Country (missing the meet at Regis tomorrow, and I'll miss practicing with the team), and pretty much relaxing.

The plus sides of going home is guaranteed food (good food), plenty of sleep, get to see my buddies again (going out tonight with them...), get to be a student ambassador to North again this year (WPI is giving me a gift certificate to the B for it!!!), and I'll get to finish up "A Storm of Swords", the third book in George R. R. Martin's epic series "A Song of Ice and Fire". GO BUY AND READ THE SERIES!!!

Posted 14:42 by Tycho

Upon leaving my linear algebra exam, I let out a huge sigh of relief, and took a deep breath...I'm a free man (for the next 10 days)

All my finals...done...over with...I can finally RELAX!!!

I already pretty much know my grades. I earned an 81 on my DiffEQ's final, which makes my final grade in the class an 86.2. If I got a 0 on my Statics exam, I'll still have a 74 in the course.
I took the Linear Algebra final and I'm pretty sure I didn't no less than an 80 on it, meaning an average of about 85 or so.

Life is good. Now to go get ready for cross country practice--I want to test out my hip.

Thanks go out to everyone that have helped me this term...from the professors, to my friends who did their best to make sure I remained sane (even if the effort failed, thanks!!!).

Oh, and my high Fly Sui score? 105. Take that! I've got the hand eye coordination of a....a...guy who can catch flies with chopsticks!

Posted 23:31 by Tycho

Ok, I've got some good news.

My hip is much better. I'm actually thinking about doing a light running workout tomorrow to see if the severe pain returns. If it does, I'm on the bike for the next few weeks, without a doubt. I'm thinking of a light 2 mile tempo run on the track.

If I can just do light workouts everyday for a couple months, I might be able to avoid the MRI machine (wow...2 tesla...mmmm...) and I might be able to avoid stress fractures again. I talked to coach...would like for me to get to a base of 45 miles/week by the end of the summer. Its attainable, and I might be able to go as high as 55 or 60 if I start training early in the spring.

I took the DiffEQ final a few hours ago...man, it was just as much fun as getting kicked in the nuts with a steel toed boot (and unfortunately, some people know how much fun that is...). It went alright, though. I think I passed...even if it was by the skin of my teeth.

Tomorrow has my Lin Alg exam at 2 and my Statics exam at 1. I'm SOOOO looking forward to them (if you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic).

As of 3PM of October 16th, 2003, I am a free man (for the next 10 days, that is).

Friday we're having a celebration at my apartment (no alcohol, preferably), so that should be fun.

Yes, I'm tired. Yes, I'm overstressed. Yes, I need sleep. Yes, I need food. Yes, I need a drink (not alcohol, mind you).

Three quotes of the day:

"Malo mori quam foedari."--Family motto

"Fear benefits the living nothing" -- The 13th Warrior

"Forever your power and strength stay with me"-- Dropkick Murphy's ("Forever")

Good night all, stay safe.

Posted 23:35 by Tycho

Update on my hip: not good...not good at all...pretty shitty condition. Even going into a jog puts me in so much pain that I can hardly stand, let alone walk. I might get an MRI to make sure I didn't get a stress fracture this time around for real, because it certainly feels like it at times.

I'm not screwing around with my hip by attempting to run on it--the pain is right in the joint. I may not be the most intelligent person around, but I'm not risking it, not my hip.

Do you know what it feels like to be part of a team, work your ass off for it, but then find out that you can no longer contribute or even stick around with them much? Its a horrible feeling. Practice was a big social aspect of my day (well, pretty much the only social aspect, seeing that for four weeks I was completely swamped with work). I dunno, I guess its something like being in combat with your unit, and you get wounded, and you're sent back to the hospital and have to go home for the war, except the feeling isn't even CLOSE to what that would be.

On a related note--RED SOX KICK ASS!!! Defeated the Oakland A's 4-3. There were riots in Worcester, apparently. No first hand reports though, so I'm not sure how true it is. All I know is that the noise was damn loud outside.

Posted 22:04 by Tycho

Today has not been a good day. Got a 69 on a statics exam, but that's my lowest exam, and so it will be dropped. I will pass Statics even if I get a 0 on the final (unless I messed up on how much each exam is worth).

My Lin Alg exam has been pushed back to Thursday because of the Sox game tonight.

Went to the B tonight for food. They're burgers are so worth it. Lots of fries and onion rings, and a nice BIG burger for $5.49. Mmmmmmmmm....

Fight practice was ok...I sucked bigtime, but shit happens sometimes and you gotta play with the cards you're dealt.

Ok, for the REALLY shitty part of the day: cross country might be over for me. For those of you who haven't had the displeasure of knowing me that long, last year, I overtrained and overstressed my hips. I would go out for a run and come back...a few minutes later I was in so much pain that I wouldn't be able to walk, and I'd need help to get up the stairs (thank goodness for bannisters). It would happen all the time. I went to see a trainer about it, and they put me through an MRI...they said I had come VERY VERY close to giving myself a bad stress fracture in my hip. And today, a few hours after practice (fartlek day...it was a REALLY fun and relaxing run), my hip started hurting again. Actually, I tried getting up a few minutes ago, but my right leg almost refused to hold my weight (that wasn't fun).

That's all I've got for you folks tonight. Take care of yourselves.

Posted 22:00 by Tycho

Excellent news (for now)!

I checked my DiffEQ's exam grade: 95!!! I can't believe I aced it. Unless this was out of 200 points, which I wouldn't be surprised that he'd pull something like that :-P.

Today I went to O'er the Northern Lands. Reason? My homeland was being invaded (Rhiassa). Nine brave Rhiassan souls, along with other courageous peoples, stood as staunch defenders of the border keep at Forevergreen Hill. Wave after wave of enemies assaulted our position, and we held the line. Things were looking quite hairy for a while, but only after our portcullis fell (YES, WE HAD A PORTCULLIS!!!). I tried out my hand at combat archery today--I'm actually a good shot, except for when I hit Janna in the face (ouch--it was my fault, I was in a rush and held the bow upside down, and nocked the arrow higher than its supposed to be, so that royally sucked).

I only died twice, which is exceptionally good considering the odds.

Defending a real defensible position (IE a castle) is wicked fun. Especially if you have a wicked awesome portcullis to keep the enemy at bay while the pikes and archers work at them. Unfortunately the portcullis was eventually destroyed, so the shields (I dropped the bow and picked up my shield) and pikes formed a "cup" inside the the castle, which maximized our usage of a choke point right where the portcullis had been.

By the end, I was dead tired, and so began making a fool of myself (as usual when I'm tired), and by the time I left the B, I was being sort of an asshole...I was way beyond tired then...almost fell asleep in the restaurant. I'd like to apologize for all those who had to put up with me at the B...I don't mean to act like an asshole or make a fool of myself, but I was just so wicked tired by then. Again, sorry.

And every week about this time, one of my roommate's tells me I need a girlfriend. Thanks for reminding me. I'm pretty sure I heard you the last 7 times you told me, no need to rub it in.

I'm really burning out fast. 5 weeks of hard work...2 more to go, and burning out fast...not good. Thanks to my friends, I've been able to lower my stress level from "getting gray hair" to "barely tolerable" (yes, I am getting gray hair...I saw a few a couple days ago). The 10 day term break is going to be awesome.

This should have come first, but my thoughts are barely coherent at this point (and woo-hoo! I've still got some homework to finish up!)...I'd like to give ALL of my friend's a big thank you. I don't know how I'd live without you guys. Thanks to all of you, I'm no longer the one guy no one really wants to associate with, I owe pretty much everything I am and stand for to you people, and to God. I pray for all of your safety and success, and thank you for everything you have done for me. Someday I pray I'll be able to return the service in kind.

Ah yes, now there's homework to attend to, and my mind is blown...I'm tired, stressed, not in the mood to do it, and did I mention tired? It must, however, be completed. Then I will crash and hopefully get a really good night's sleep.

Good night, and the next person who pokes me is going to be very, very sorry that they did so. Or not. Or maybe. I dunno. I'll figure it out someday soon...like next Thursday. Or something like that. Maybe not ever.

Either way, good night, my friends, safe travels and prestige await!

Posted 20:32 by Tycho

Good evening, everyone.

I have the good news, the bad news, and the ugly news.

The ugly news is that I have a DiffEQ exam Friday with Tricky Lui. The bad news is that I have a Linear Algebra exam Tuesday, but thats ok.

The good news is that tomorrow night, I will be going to the newbie night quest. I've planned my DiffEQ study times around it, so that I'll be able to go.

The really good news is that the term is almost over. Two weeks...sometimes I wish someone would just shoot me and take me out of my misery.

Here's tomorrow's schedule: wake up at 9, class at 10...11-1 do my statics homework for Friday, eat lunch, and study DiffEQ...1-3 I have class. 3-4 study for DiffEQ. 4-4:30 extra light cross country practice (my quads have been really tight lately, so I'm probably going to do a warm up and then only a little light lifting)...4:30-7:00: STUDY DiffEQ, eat a big supper...7:30-Midnight: QUESTING!!! Midnight-3 or 4: shower (duh!), then study DiffEQ and make the two allowed crypt sheets. I'll still be able to get 6-7 hours of sleep. Wake up at about 10. Get to Tricky Lui's office by 10:45. Study for the last hour and fifteen minutes before the exam and get some last minute tips and help from him.

The exam is at 12...I hope my statics professor won't mind me taking a little nap in his class...DiffEQ is so...draining.

I need to finish my application for the IGSD for my IQP (I would like to go to Australia or Denmark).

The stress is piling high. I apologize to everyone around me when I act like a freak...its starting to get to me. I'd like to thank all my friends--without you guys, I'd have gone insane (or sane, however you want to look at it) a long time ago.

Good night, and stay safe.