Posted 20:02 by Tycho

Alright, I'm back. I was supposed to pick up history notes so I could start writing the paper, but one of my partners wasn't at the agreed upon meeting spot and time not once, but twice...

Ok, I talked to Duncan last night. I didn't exactly have a choice in the matter. He asked if I wanted to talk and I was like "...not really..."...then after I had ripped my knee up (again), it was more like "ok, I can tell you're not ok, we ARE going to talk, lets go to the other room". It prepared me for having to talk to the guy today.

Letting everything off my back and talking to Steve was probably the healthiest thing I've done for myself. At first, I was on the verge of tears, and my voice wavered and cracked. By the end, my head was clear, I was calm, and my voice strong and determined. I pretty much told him everything, leaving no stone unturned. Once I started talking, I couldn't stop. It just came out in a rush and a flood. He listened, and then related his own life experiences to my own. It was comforting, reassuring, and gave me motivation to not give up on schoolwork. I've got 9 days, then its over. Might as well do my damned best and finish it up strong.

I'd discuss it more, but that means I have to go into details, something I don't want to do here at this point in time. Possibly not ever. Its too painful.

And a big part of it is a lack of communication between Josh, Jen, and myself. They don't seem to want to talk things out with me anymore...or even with me at all, actually. That gnaws at me, severely. I'm prepared for them to cut off all ties altogether, but them not talking to me is just making it a shitload worse, and it'll be alot harder to continue on and heal without either reassurance from them, or complete severance.

Oh well. C'est ma vie. Au revoir.